JUST IN: According to Sandman’s final ratings, Celtic vs. the Rangers has looked lethal.

THE FRIENDLY GHOST – 5/10 – Our friendly ghost appeared to be haunted, possibly by himself, as he started setting up zombie chances and then making excellent saves from them. Overall, though, he too seemed to be plagued by the overall lack of direction and purpose that cost us so much, even though he managed to avoid calling up Ian Andrews’ ghost and was content to simply give up the three.

SCHLUPP THE ‘RA – 5/10 – Jeff’s inability to jump is finally a vulnerability. Ratskin, the flying hobbit, startled everyone by out-leaping him for a nightmarish start. A fluke? Nope—after a similar failure from one of their corners, Kasper later helped them out. wasn’t the commanding strength we’ve seen in his performances thus far, but he nearly made apologies with a rasping strike in the second-half comeback.

WAYNE GRETZKY – 2/10 – A calamitous day as the Marauding Moose transforms into the Disastrous Donkey. Probably AJ’s most ineffectual and negative performance of the season – seemed essentially detached mentally, at significant moments in the game. After a slog of a first 45 where he struggled to link with Kuhn effectively, the second brought his crucial errors to a climactic, costly nadir – slipping at a long ball, missing the recovery tackle that would have stopped the winner, then blowing a redemptive chance at the very death by smashing the roof off the Jock Stein with the roof of the net beckoning. A nightmare indeed.

THE FRIENDLY GHOST – 5/10 – Our friendly ghost appeared to be haunted, possibly by himself, as he started setting up zombie chances and then making excellent saves from them. Overall, though, he too seemed to be plagued by the overall lack of direction and purpose that cost us so much, even though he managed to avoid calling up Ian Andrews’ ghost and was content to simply give up the three.

SCHLUPP THE ‘RA – 5/10 – Jeff’s inability to jump is finally a vulnerability. Ratskin, the flying hobbit, startled everyone by out-leaping him for a nightmarish start. A fluke? Nope—after a similar failure from one of their corners, Kasper later helped them out. wasn’t the commanding strength we’ve seen in his performances thus far, but he nearly made apologies with a rasping strike in the second-half comeback.

WAYNE GRETZKY – 2/10 – A calamitous day as the Marauding Moose transforms into the Disastrous Donkey. Probably AJ’s most ineffectual and negative performance of the season – seemed essentially detached mentally, at significant moments in the game. After a slog of a first 45 where he struggled to link with Kuhn effectively, the second brought his crucial errors to a climactic, costly nadir – slipping at a long ball, missing the recovery tackle that would have stopped the winner, then blowing a redemptive chance at the very death by smashing the roof off the Jock Stein with the roof of the net beckoning. A nightmare indeed.

THE FRIENDLY GHOST – 5/10 – Our friendly ghost appeared to be haunted, possibly by himself, as he started setting up zombie chances and then making excellent saves from them. Overall, though, he too seemed to be plagued by the overall lack of direction and purpose that cost us so much, even though he managed to avoid calling up Ian Andrews’ ghost and was content to simply give up the three.

SCHLUPP THE ‘RA – 5/10 – Jeff’s inability to jump is finally a vulnerability. Ratskin, the flying hobbit, startled everyone by out-leaping him for a nightmarish start. A fluke? Nope—after a similar failure from one of their corners, Kasper later helped them out. wasn’t the commanding strength we’ve seen in his performances thus far, but he nearly made apologies with a rasping strike in the second-half comeback.

WAYNE GRETZKY – 2/10 – A calamitous day as the Marauding Moose transforms into the Disastrous Donkey. Probably AJ’s most ineffectual and negative performance of the season – seemed essentially detached mentally, at significant moments in the game. After a slog of a first 45 where he struggled to link with Kuhn effectively, the second brought his crucial errors to a climactic, costly nadir – slipping at a long ball, missing the recovery tackle that would have stopped the winner, then blowing a redemptive chance at the very death by smashing the roof off the Jock Stein with the roof of the net beckoning. A nightmare indeed.